There are a lot of common mistakes that we all make right after an emotional breakup, but one of the big problems people face is what to say to your ex to get them back. The answer to this question is very simple, you say nothing and make no attempt to contact them!
Right after a big breakup, a lot of emotions are at a fever pitch and it can be easy for either of you to say the wrong things and cause serious and maybe even irreparable damage to the relationship and the possibilities of getting back together.
If you can avoid this the chances of a successful reunion become a lot easier. Experts in the field of relationship recovery have discovered that it is best to give your ex a cooling off period during which you do not speak to each other at all.
This is not a psychological trick or game to get them back, it is part of an overall strategy to help diffuse the current situation and to set up future plans to get an ex back. Right now constantly annoying contact, text messaging, calling or e-mailing your ex, does not, and will not work.
Simply put the no contact rule is that you should not initiate contact with your ex. It does not mean that you are refusing to talk to him or her. It should actually be called the 'leave your ex alone and give them, and yourself, time to think and recover rule'.
You want to keep the lines of communication open for the future, but for right now constantly annoying contact, text messaging, calling or e-mailing your ex, does not, and will not work, you are going to have to stop calling, text messaging, or 'accidentally' running into him or her.
The premise behind this rule is that creating a physical (and mental) distance between your ex and yourself allows for a faster healing process which makes it easier to reunite. It is obvious that you both need a break to clear your heads and to re-set your emotions.
When the emotional turmoil is at a minimum, it is then that logic and clear thinking can set in. Another benefit is that after a break up a person will become emotionally vulnerable, and susceptible to acting needy and insecure. These traits naturally repel attraction, especially in women.
No contact gives time for the other party to discover how much you meant in their lives because the contrast of your absence versus your presence is so extreme. Your ex may even discover (perhaps to their surprise) how much they miss you.
When you were a big part of your exes life and you suddenly disappear, do you think they can not help but wonder what you are up to? This is a neat little psychological angle, the more your ex thinks about you, the more they are becoming obsessed with you all over again.
In a nutshell you want to give the ex a chance to miss you. This is not going to happen if you are constantly calling your ex begging for another chance, or asking them to explain the break up over and over again.
Also when you are constantly trying to make unwanted contact you run the risk of annoying him or her, to the point where they refuse to talk to you. And the whole time you are acting this way, you are chipping away at your own dignity and self respect.
The no contact rule really does work, but just by having no contact, and then doing nothing, is not going to win your ex lover back. No contact is to be used as part of an overall plan to get your ex back.
Having an underlying strategy and following an overall plan to get your ex back will make your efforts a lot more effective. But to have a successful reunion means getting help, and taking the time to learn some things about psychology and people's basic needs and desires.
What you say to your ex, and when and how to restart contact after a break up is of the utmost importance, and can make or break the deal. T.W. Jackson the gifted post-relationship mentor inspired this article about getting an ex back.
This short article can only give you a small part of his overall plan. For more indepth information about the strategies, steps, and psychological techniques for getting back together, it is recommended to listen to him, because he has helped thousands of persons in the exact same situation as you.
His website is called The Magic Of Making Up, I hope this helps you, the more information you can get the better it is for you. Whatever you choose to try you do need to get started on this as soon as possible to maximize your chances.
The entire article is on Ex Back Online.
Right after a big breakup, a lot of emotions are at a fever pitch and it can be easy for either of you to say the wrong things and cause serious and maybe even irreparable damage to the relationship and the possibilities of getting back together.
If you can avoid this the chances of a successful reunion become a lot easier. Experts in the field of relationship recovery have discovered that it is best to give your ex a cooling off period during which you do not speak to each other at all.
This is not a psychological trick or game to get them back, it is part of an overall strategy to help diffuse the current situation and to set up future plans to get an ex back. Right now constantly annoying contact, text messaging, calling or e-mailing your ex, does not, and will not work.
Simply put the no contact rule is that you should not initiate contact with your ex. It does not mean that you are refusing to talk to him or her. It should actually be called the 'leave your ex alone and give them, and yourself, time to think and recover rule'.
You want to keep the lines of communication open for the future, but for right now constantly annoying contact, text messaging, calling or e-mailing your ex, does not, and will not work, you are going to have to stop calling, text messaging, or 'accidentally' running into him or her.
The premise behind this rule is that creating a physical (and mental) distance between your ex and yourself allows for a faster healing process which makes it easier to reunite. It is obvious that you both need a break to clear your heads and to re-set your emotions.
When the emotional turmoil is at a minimum, it is then that logic and clear thinking can set in. Another benefit is that after a break up a person will become emotionally vulnerable, and susceptible to acting needy and insecure. These traits naturally repel attraction, especially in women.
No contact gives time for the other party to discover how much you meant in their lives because the contrast of your absence versus your presence is so extreme. Your ex may even discover (perhaps to their surprise) how much they miss you.
When you were a big part of your exes life and you suddenly disappear, do you think they can not help but wonder what you are up to? This is a neat little psychological angle, the more your ex thinks about you, the more they are becoming obsessed with you all over again.
In a nutshell you want to give the ex a chance to miss you. This is not going to happen if you are constantly calling your ex begging for another chance, or asking them to explain the break up over and over again.
Also when you are constantly trying to make unwanted contact you run the risk of annoying him or her, to the point where they refuse to talk to you. And the whole time you are acting this way, you are chipping away at your own dignity and self respect.
The no contact rule really does work, but just by having no contact, and then doing nothing, is not going to win your ex lover back. No contact is to be used as part of an overall plan to get your ex back.
Having an underlying strategy and following an overall plan to get your ex back will make your efforts a lot more effective. But to have a successful reunion means getting help, and taking the time to learn some things about psychology and people's basic needs and desires.
What you say to your ex, and when and how to restart contact after a break up is of the utmost importance, and can make or break the deal. T.W. Jackson the gifted post-relationship mentor inspired this article about getting an ex back.
This short article can only give you a small part of his overall plan. For more indepth information about the strategies, steps, and psychological techniques for getting back together, it is recommended to listen to him, because he has helped thousands of persons in the exact same situation as you.
His website is called The Magic Of Making Up, I hope this helps you, the more information you can get the better it is for you. Whatever you choose to try you do need to get started on this as soon as possible to maximize your chances.
The entire article is on Ex Back Online.
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